


Questionable Purposes

by Michael Alexander (MistressOakdown)



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (1963)
Genre: F/M, Masturbation, TARDISes are sentient, Tissue Compression Eliminator, and also little shits sometimes, failproof plan there, hm yes lets put a deadly alien weapon up our business, jesus christ Y/N why are you so dumb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-20
Updated: 2019-11-20
Packaged: 2021-02-13 15:01:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21496186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistressOakdown/pseuds/Michael%20Alexander
Summary: Prompt: Everyone keeps joking about the Tissue Compression Eliminator looking like a dildo, so I thought “fuck it, why not?”A/N: This is a crack!fic at its finest, y’all. Take it seriously if you want, but no TCEs were harmed in the making of this story. Also, the Tissue Compression Eliminator is not meant to be used for any purposes other than shrinking jerks. Don’t try this at home, kids.
Relationships: The Master (Ainley)/Reader
Kudos: 24





	Questionable Purposes

The Master very rarely slept. With his Gallifreyan biology, he needed much less than his human companion, yet because of this, they never tended to sleep at the same time. Today was one of the few days that he actually needed rest, so Y/N promised to not get into any trouble as he retired to his room. Y/N walked around the console as she studied the different buttons, levers, and flashing lights. After a moment, her eyes locked on what looked like a small compartment. She opened the compartment slowly, and when her eyes landed on the small device that The Master always wielded, her excitement built instantly.

The Master kept this thing on him at all times, never letting her even look at it properly, and now it was in her hands and he wasn’t there to take it from her. Taking the weapon out of the compartment and closing it back, she examined the deadly weapon, several thoughts running through her mind as she looked at it. One thought that kept repeating through her mind was the realization that the device looked quite… _phallic_. Looking around the empty console room as if he was going to materialize through the walls and catch her, she let a manic grin cross her face as she sprinted out of the room, heading towards her own.

Once she entered her bedroom she closed the door quickly, locking it. She launched onto her bed, the mattress bouncing as she scooted to the middle of it. She continued examining the toy as she tried to figure out how to control it. The only button was at the end of the handle, but there were no controls. It was then that she remembered how much of Timelord technology was thought-based. She debated what to do for a moment before a thought hit her mind that she couldn’t ignore. ‘_Why not?_’ She asked herself as she put her plan in motion.

She focused on the device as she held the button, concentrating on the idea of its vibrations. Soon enough, the small device began to hum, Y/N’s eyes filling with both excitement and apprehension. Was she really about to do this? The answer, of course, was yes, because she drank her Dumb Bitch Juice that morning, and using the TCE in this manner was only the beginning of the list of bad ideas she had planned.

She hopped off the bed, shimmying out of her pants and jumping back on. She moved back to the middle of her bed, spreading her legs as she looked up at the ceiling, questioning her life choices. After a few moments of self-reflection, she finally got the courage to lower the device to where she wanted it, the vibrations making her flinch at first. The moment she began thinking the vibration was too strong, it softened slightly. Her eyes widened as she realized it would pick up on her thought as she did this, making a mischievous smirk cross her face as she melted into the sensations. She began getting lost in her own world, the decreasing and increasing of the device making her get louder than she’d originally intended, soft moans and whimpers echoing off the walls of her bedroom.

Unfortunately for her, The Master’s TARDIS was apparently also feeling just as mischievous as she was, as the ship had moved The Master’s room to be right next to Y/N’s. She was so lost in the sensations that she didn’t notice the slight change of atmosphere. She _also_ didn’t hear the knock on her door, or the sound of it unlocking (another trick of the TARDIS’s). Her eyes were screwed shut, her body mere seconds away from orgasm. Her breathing sped up as she started going over the edge, but she stupidly opened her eyes the moment she hit her climax.

The sight of The Master standing before her with his mouth and eyes opened wide in surprise only fueled her orgasm, the sudden adrenaline spike of being caught simply boosting the feelings she was already experiencing. Her eyes screwed shut again as she let the waves wash over her, her brain incapable of dealing with the sudden intruder at the moment. She was pretty sure that she moaned ‘Master’ at some point because she heard a small noise of surprise come from the aforementioned intruder.

As she came down from her high, she looked back at him, his look of surprise having morphed into some kind of combination between anger, confusion, and arousal. The TCE slowed down to a halt, the room now deathly quiet. She glanced down between her legs, before flicking her eyes up to The Master. She did this a couple more times before slowly pulling the TCE away, closing and crossing her legs.

“Um… hello.” She greeted shyly, his only response being a slight movement of his head in acknowledgment. He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times as if he was trying to form a sentence, before suddenly blurting out what seemed like a paragraph.

“What in Rassilon’s name do you think you’re doing, you fool? You could’ve died by simply touching that, and your human hormones managed to talk you into using it like… like _that?!_” He practically yelled, Y/N flinching back. She looked to her lap in shame, trying to ignore the tears building up in her eyes. She heard him sigh, and she could hear him moving over to the bed, stopping when he was next to her. He took the TCE out of her hands, wiping it on the comforter before sticking it in his pocket.

He placed his gloved fingers under her chin, forcing her to look up at him. A lone tear managed to escape her eyes and he quickly wiped it away, before leaning down to be at eye level with the human.

“If you wanted to feel something that would make you moan my name, all you had to do was ask.” He said, not giving Y/N a chance to react before pressing his lips to hers, the leather of his gloves caressing her thigh. She leaned into the kiss, her mind and body submitting to him almost instantly. He leaned back, smiling gently at her.

“Just promise me that you won’t have sex with any more deadly things.” He asked, and she seemed to contemplate for a moment, before locking eyes with him, a mischievous look having returned to her expression.

“Well, you’re a deadly thing, so I can’t entirely promise that.” She replied, The Master letting out a small involuntary gasp of surprise at that admission. He quickly regained his wits, pushing Y/N to the bed and crawling above her.

“Oh, my dear Y/N, you have been naive.” He spoke lowly, before kissing her fiercely again. This was going to be a long night.


End file.
